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Ever since I was a young boy,
I've played and watched baseball.
Mantle, Mays and Snider
I idolized them all.
But now here comes Bud Selig
With something off the wall
That deaf dumb and blind man’s
Sure gonna kill baseball!
He stands like a statue,
His head has plastic hair.
He rants about contraction
To anger Donald Fehr.
He makes his lame pronouncements,
He has no clue at all.
That deaf dumb and blind man’s
Sure gonna kill baseball!
He's a pinhead dimwit
His thoughts are so far out
A pinhead dimwit,
There isn’t any doubt.
Why do you think he does it? I don't know!
What makes him so lame?
Contraction won’t save baseball
As far as I can tell,
The moneyed teams just take all
The rest can go to hell.
It seems that the World Series,
Will not be played next Fall
That deaf dumb and blind man’s
Sure gonna kill baseball!
I thought there’d be
A brand new baseball pact
But now I see
That Selig don’t know jack.
They won’t get to the table
They won’t get to agree.
There won’t be any baseball
Before two thousand three.
His actions are just stupid
He has a lot of gall
That deaf dumb and blind man’s
Sure gonna kill baseball!
November 10, 2001: Two days after a very exciting World Series ends, baseball commissioner and all-around fool, Bud Selig, announces that two teams will fold before the start of the 2002 season. This serves no purpose except to incite labor strife. It certainly will not make the playing field any more level for the remaining teams.