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What a drag it is popping up..
"Baseball's different today,"
I hear every hitter say
Hitting homers is the way to make big bucks
So he's needing something fast to increase his muscle mass
And starts building up his deltoids with some slugger's little steroids
And it helps him on his way, to hit homers for big pay.
(4-bar instrumental interlude)
"Things are different today,"
I hear ev'ry hitter say
Chicks don't dig a guy unless he's really buff
And his confidence abounds when he faces Kevin Brown
After building up his deltoids with some slugger's little steroids
And they help him on his way, reaching fences every day.
(4-bar instrumental interlude)
Doctor, please, some more of these
I tell you what, I need a shot
What a drag it is popping up.
(2-bar instrumental interlude)
"Fans just aren't the same today,"
I hear ev'ry hitter say
They just don't appreciate a blooping hit
They're not having any fun till they see a long home run
So keep building up your deltoids with some slugger's little steroids
And they help you through the night, hit the ball with all your might.
(4-bar instrumental interlude)
Doctor, please, some more of these
I tell you what, I need a shot
What a drag it is popping up.
(2-bar instrumental interlude)
Hitting's much too hard today,"
I hear ev'ry hitter say
Chasing curve balls for a living seems so hard
Your career is down the tubes and you're starting to grow boobs
No more building up your deltoids with some slugger's little steroids
They just helped you to some cash, but your life is in the trash.
May 31, 2002: Jose Canseco recently stated that 80% of Major League players use steroids. Ken Caminiti revealed that he used steroids when he won the NL MVP in 1996. A Rolling Stones melody from the mid 60's seems appropriate here.