Songs of Baseball
Baseball Idol (August 12, 2006)
Mets' catcher Paul Lo Duca was in the news recently. He is in the middle of a divorce, and has been accused of infidelity. There is also quite a bit of talk that he likes to frequent the track and bet on the horses. This old song, recorded originally by Ricky Nelson, seems to fit.
Will You Still Be Here Tomorrow? (June 9, 2006)
The Mets recently called up top prospect Lastings Milledge while Xavier Nady is recovering from an emergency appendectomy. Milledge has been playing so well, and has become such a fan favorite, that the fans are clamoring for the team to keep him after Nady returns. Here's my twist on a wonderful song that was written by Carole King and was a big hit for the Shirelles.
Mr. Golden Hair (May 27, 2006)
The Mets recently called Jose Lima up from the minors to take a spot in the starting rotation. He showed up with his hair bleached blond, and pitched about as well as Paris Hilton. After three starts, he was designated for assignment, but the memory of his golden locks lives on.
Jorge Julio's Pitch Leaves the Ballyard (April 15, 2006)
During the off-season, the Mets traded pitcher Kris Benson, and his wife, Anna, to Baltimore in exchange for relief pitcher Jorge Julio. Anna's inappropriate comments and inappropriate attire at Mets' functions in addition to her husband's mediocrity prompted Omar Minaya to make the deal. Julio, whose career has been in rapid decline, has shown no signs of turning it around in his first four appearance as a Met. In less than 4 innings, he has allowed 11 hits and 11 runs, including 3 homers. Yes, I know I recently used this Paul Simon tune when Julio Franco was signed, but I felt the urge to use it again.
Me and Julio in the Queens Ballyard (December 9, 2005)
After making big deals to bring Carlos Delgado, Billy Wagner and Paul Lo Duca to the Mets, general Manager Omar Minaya signed Jose Valentin and ageless wonder Julio Franco as spare parts. This Paul Simon song contemplates what Brooklyn native Lo Duca might think about the signings of Valentin and Franco. The Jake and Gaby mentioned in the first verse refer to Mike Jacobs and Gaby Hernandez, who were traded for Lo Duca.
Long Long Time (October 14, 2005)
It has now been five years since the Yankees won a World Series, with the Angels dashing their hopes in this year's AL Division Series. This Linda Ronstadt song sums up Mr. Steinbrenner's feelings. Unfortunately, I could not find a midi file to go with it.
Just Dropped In (July 2, 2005)
Kenny Rogers was recently suspended for a couple of on-field incidents involving TV cameramen. So I took the song that he recorded with the First Edition in the late 1960's and updated it to reflect his current circumstances. Oh, wait a minute. That was a different Kenny Rogers.
Yanks Rotation (May 8, 2005)
My friend Vee gets great pleasure when the Yankees lose. Their pitching staff is ins shambles. Two rookie starters made their major league debut for the Yankees in the same week. And these guys look as forgettable as the last time this happened in 1991. I'm sure you all remember Wade Taylor and Jeff Johnson. So, it is with great pleasure, I present Vee's tribute to The Who and the geniuses that traded for Kevin Brown and signed Jaret Wright. This is the third of three songs by three different authors that are posted to my page at the same time.
Omar's Theme (May 8, 2005)
My friend Syl has been watching with amusement how poorly the Yankees have been playing, with all their pitching problems. She wrote this song a couple of days prior to the Kentucky Derby. George Steinbrenner's horse was favored to win. Unfortunately for George, like his Yankees appear to be doing, the horse finished out of the money. This is the second of three songs by three different authors that are posted to my page at the same time.
Beat It (May 8, 2005)
My friend Mookster, who like many fellow Mets fans, has been disgusted with the performance of Tom Glavine since he signed with the Mets. So, he took it upon himself to write this piece to the tune of a Michael Jackson song. Personally, I'm disgusted with both Glavine's performance and Jackson's lifestyle. This is the first of three songs by three different authors that are posted to my page at the same time.
Go Away Jose (March 18, 2005)
Spring training is starting to get serious. Teams are starting to cut their rosters down getting ready for the 25-man limit on Opening Day. So what is in the baseball news? Jose Canseco's stupid book, and baseball players and executives summoned to testify before a Congressional committee. The price of gas is over $2.00 per gallon in most places, our soldiers are dying in the Middle East, and Congress has nothing better to worry about than baseball players using steroids. Whatever.
Dueling Pedros (December 18, 2004)
I did not write either of these songs. They were submitted to me by friends after the Mets signed pitcher Pedro Martinez to a free agent contract. Please let my friends Mookster (Viva Pedro Martinez) and Sylvia (Get Back) know how much you enjoy their work.
Traded for Heredia (December 4, 2004)
The big news in baseball was the steroid issue after it was revealed that Jason Giambi told a grand jury that he took steroids and Barry Bonds also testified that he took them too, although he stated that he thought they were something else. I covered that topic in May 2002 with a song called Sluggers Little Steroids. This topic is more mundane. For the last two seasons, Mike Stanton was a mostly innefective lefty coming out of the pen. Mets fans have been begging new General Manager Omar Minaya to trade him. And trade him, Minaya did. For Felix Heredia, one of the few lefties that are worse than Stanton. The Neil Diamond song found here seemed to work nicely.
Stupid Ways (November 20, 2004)
This is a contribution from my friend, Mookster, who, like many knowledgeable Mets fans is upset with new General Manager, Omar Minaya's continuing pursuit of Sammy Sosa. The original Carlos Santana song was a big hit when the Mets won tehir first championship in 1969. If you like the song, please let the Mookster know.
Wake Up Little Redbirds (October 27, 2004)
This song was written as the Red Sox have taken a 3-0 lead in the 2004 World Series. The Cardinals look like they are asleep. My friend Sylvia came up with the idea for this song. I think it is because she is a fan of Jim Edmonds and Albert Pujols.
Slip Slidin' Away (October 21, 2004)
In the 2004 American League Championship Series, the Yankees were 3 outs away from sweeping the Red Sox, who then stormed back to win an unprecedented four straight games, keeping the Yankees out of the World Series in what is undoubtedly the biggest post-season collapse in baseball history. I'll bet Paul Simon never thought that one of his songs would be used to describe the destruction of the Yankees.
Time of the Season (October 18, 2004)
Red Sox pitcher Pedro Martinez lost to the Yankees twice in September and called the Yankees his daddy. He pitched against them in Game 2 of the American League Championship Series, and although he pitched well he was done in by a John Olerud home run. I hate writing anything nice about the Yankees, but I felt an obligation in this case. Besides, Olerud played for the Mets a lot longer than he played for the Yankees.
(I Know) They're Losing Too (Otcober 2, 2004)
On September 25, 2004, the Cubs held the lead for the National League wild card. They had a 3-0 lead over the Mets with 2 out and the 9th inning, when a recently called-up rookie named Victor Diaz hit a three run homer. They lost the game in the 11th when another recently called-up rookie named Craig Brazell hit a homer. They proceeded to lose 5 out of the next 6, and by the end of the day on October 1, they were 2 games behind by the Giants and Astros with 2 games to play. Only a miracle will put the Cubs into the post-season.
Swingin' in the Wind (September 9, 2004)
As the Mets continued to play horribly and the promises of the Spring and early Summer faded into nothingness, one of the acquisitions of the previous winter, Mike Cameron, seemed to personify the plight of the team. He came to New York with a reputation of being the equal of Andruw Jones in the outfield, but somehow managed to drop several routine flies. He also seemed to have very little regard for the strike zone, killing potential rallies all season with both swinging strikeouts and called strikeouts. I'm not implying that Mike Cameron is the only reason for the Mets' demise. It's simply that his performance has echoed that of the team and he fits the song.
Murphy Man (September 6, 2004)
As of the date this was written, the Mets had lost 14 of their last 15 games. Nobody has been performing except recently called-up rookie, David Wright. The free fall seems to have come shortly after the passing of their legendary broadcaster, Bob Murphy. My friend Sylvia came up with this marvelous tune to Billy Joel's Piano Man to lament the Mets' plight, and I am honored that she allowed me to post it on my site.
The Pitch Gets Whacked (July 15, 2004)
The 2004 All-Star Game saw Roger Clemens and Mike Piazza paired as the starting battery for the National League. Their prior history is well documented. and suffice it to say that the relationship was antagonistic. Clemens was touched up for six runs in obe inning, including homers by Manny Ramirez and Alfonso Soriano. Did Piazza tip the pitches? We'll never know, but I had a little fun with a number by Elton John.
Horrible Tonight (July 4, 2004)
This comes one day after John Franco was brought into a tie game with two out and the bases empty in the top of the ninth inning, for the express purpose of facing Jason Giambi. Giambi doubled and Franco quickly proceeded to load the bases, and go 3-0 to Jorge Posada. After 2 called strikes, Franco threw a borderline pitch, and the umpire called strike three. The Mets won the game and Franco was the winning pitcher despite a horrible outing. If Eric Clapton were a Mets fan he'd have written this song.
What's His Face (May 24, 2004)
Mets manager Art Howe was being interviewed. He couldn't remember the name of young catcher-first baseman Jason Phillips, referring to him as What's His Face. Phillips responded by hitting homers in the next two games. The Fred in the song refers to Mets owner, Fred Wilpon.
Save the Save Chance for Me (May 14, 2004)
Mets' closer Braden Looper went three weeks without a save opportunity, before gaining saves in back to back games against the Diamondbacks. The reason for the lack of opportunity had less to do with the Mets poor play, but rather that there were several games in which the Mets scored too many runs in their last at bat to present Looper with the save opportunity, or that the team's setup men blew the lead, and consequently, the opportunity for Looper evaporated. The original song, by the Drifters, hit the top of the charts in 1960.
Mr. Wilpon (April 24, 2004)
Early in the season it is obvious that the Mets don't have the horses to compete in the National League East. This old song was popular not long after current Mets owner Fred Wilpon attended Lafayette High School in Brooklyn with a stud pitcher named Koufax. Perhaps you've heard of him.
Runs Runs Runs (April 10, 2004)
The New York Mets were next to last in the National League in runs scored in 2003. They scored 25 runs in their first three games in 2004, but managed to lose two of them, largely due to bullpen failures. My good friend Sylvia suggested this Beach Boys tune, and I ran with it.
The Karim Garcia Songbook (March 13, 2004)
The 2004 Spring Training brought former Yankees Karim Garcia and Shane Spencer to the Mets. One evening they were involved in an incident which included public urination by Garcia and an alleged assault on a young man who works in a Port St. Lucie pizza parlor. My friend Sylvia and I each found an appropriate Paul Simon tune to modify to commemorate this sorry incident.
(I Don't Think) Much Of Rose (January 6, 2004)
Here's a revelation. Pete Rose bet on baseball. Like everybody didn't know this before. He wants to sell books. I'm not impressed. And neither are Mickey Dolenz, Mike Nesmith, Peter Tork and Davy Jones.
Terminate Bill Singer (November 21, 2003)
Former 20-game winner Bill Singer was hired by the Mets as a superscout and fired less than two weeks later for making racists remarks to a female Dodgers executive whose family emigrated from China. What an idiot!
Undone (October 19, 2003)
The Red Sox haven't won a World Series since 1918. The Cubs haven't won since 1908. Both teams had a three runs lead, and only needed five outs to advance to the 2003 World Series. Both managers left their starting pitcher in too long. And both teams came undone. My friend Sylvia had the inspiration for this song, and wrote the bulk of it.
Old Man Zimmer (October 13, 2003)
I read something on line entiled Old Man Zimmer after his incident with Pedro Martinez in the 2003 American League Championship Series, and I couldn't resist taking an old show tune and adapting it.
Tuesday Afternoon (October 12, 2003)
On October 11, a Saturday, the Red Sox and Yankees played Game 3 of the American League Championship Series. It was a pretty disgisting display of a lack of sportsmanship that included a couiple of bench clearing brawls, a 72-year-old coach taking a swing at a 32-year-old pitcher, and an altercation in the Yankees bullpen with a member of Boston's grounds crew. Sunday's game was rained out, forcing Game 5 to be moved to Tuesday afternoon and giving me an excuse to ruin a marvelous song by the Moody Blues.
The Continuing Story of Robert Fick (October 9, 2003)
During the 2003 NLDS, the Braves' Robert Fick wilfully interefed with Cubs' first baseman Eric Karros' attempt to catch a throw, basically by straightarming him. He was fined and benched, and possibly cost his team a shot at winning the deciding game. And with a name like Fick, you know the puns are flowing. The song comes from the Beatles White Album.
The Sinking Ship Song (September 22, 2003)
As this song was written, the Mets had one victory sandwiched between a pair of eight game losing streaks. Mets fans couldn't wait for the season to end, so they no longer would have to watch Roger Cedeno misplay routine fly balls until 2004.
The Manager Song (September 11, 2003)
This song was the result of a discussion among fans about the best or most necessary qualities a manager could have. And my friend, Syl, encouraged me to write this song.
I'm Still Crouching (August 30, 2003)
Mike Piazza returned to the Mets in mid-August after a long stint on the disabled list. After much speculation that he would be moved to first base, he returned as a catcher and appeared not to have missed a beat. Elton John's song seems to sum it all up.
Sausage Race (July 11, 2003)
The last time Randall Simon was involved in a baseball controversy, he was not at fault. He was the player John Rocker referred to as a fat monkey. However, on July 9, 2003, Simon swung his bat at a Brewers' mascot who was taking part of the sausage race at Miller Park. His swing caused the young lady in the sausage suit, and one of her fellow sausages to trip and fall. They weren't seriously injured, but Mr. Simon needs to find other means of amusing himself. But I want to thank him, because any time I can write something to the tune of a song by Queen is a good thing.
Mr. Alomar (July 5, 2003)
On July 1, the Mets traded Roberto Alomar to the Chicago White Sox for three minor leaguers. Thus, the sad history of his tenure in New York came to a close. He will still get into the Hall of Fame, but his season and a half in a Mets uniform has seriously tarnished his repuatation and his legacy. I think it's appropriate to send him on his way with a song written and performed by two guys from Queens.
No Spanish Harlem (June 12, 2003)
Steve Phillips was fired today as the general manager of the New York Mets. Many of the veteran players that he brought in are either injured, or playing far below their expected capabilities. The main culprit appears to be Roberto Alomar, who looks like he just doesn't care. My friend Sylvia had the inspiration for this song, and wrote the bulk of it, and allowed me to finish it and put it on the website. It was actually written before Phillips was canned. Great job, Syl! As usual.
For a different perspective on Mr. Sosa, please check out Tom Scanlon's Sammy Sosa (I'm in Love with Baseball Now), written long before the cork controversy.
He's Corkin' (June 5, 2003)
On June 3, 2003, Sammy Sosa's bat shattered when he hit the ball. Unfortunately for Sammy, the umpire found cork in the fragments of the bat. Was it a batting practice bat that Sammy used inadvertently? I doubt it. Sammy's image has been seriously tarnished, and he'll havbe to live with that.
Help Me Make This Team All Right (May 6, 2003)
One month into the season, the Mets look like an old, tired team in need of rebuilding. Roberto Alomar and Mo Vaughn are well past their best days and untradeable. Mike Piazza and Armando Benitez may be the only players for whom the Mets can receive anything in return. It seems like it's time to rebuild.
Mando Cuando (April 22, 2003)
In the first three weeks of the season, Armando Benitez has managed to blow four save opportunities. My buddy, Richie, had an idea for this song, and my friend Sylvia ran with it and wrote it in record time. I'm simply a conduit for other people's ideas and talent.
Idiot's Delight (April 18, 2003)
The Hall of Fame was to hold a celebration honoring the 15th anniversary of the film Bull Durham. Unfortunately, the head of the Hall of Fame, Dale Petroskey, cancelled the celebration because of his disfavor with the anti-war position held by two of the movie's stars.
Puerto Rico (April 18, 2003)
From April 11-14, 2003, the Mets and Expos played 4 games in Hiram Bithorn Stadium in San Juan, Puerto Rico. These were the first of 22 games to played there by the Expos in 2003. The Mets lost all four games, despite having an excellent chance to win 3 of them. My good friend, Sylvia, contributed this number for my website.
Baerga In Disguise (April 12, 2003)
In December 2001, Roberto Alomar was traded to the Mets by the Cleveland Indians. Mets fan expected him to help the team win the pennant. Instead, he looked like the previous All-Star second baseman that the Mets obtained from the Indians, Carlos Baerga.
Chicken Runaway (March 16, 2003)
In a Spring Training game in 2002, Dodgers' pitcher Guillermo Mota deliberately hit Mike Piazza of the Mets with a pitch. There were some words later after both had left the game. A year later, Mota came inside with the first pitch and hit Piazza with the second, then ran into the dugout before Piazza and Jeromy Burnitz could reach him. This song calls Mota what he is.
Light Hitting Shortstop (March 7, 2003)
This song was inspired by a great musician named Carlos Santana, and a light-hitting shortstop from the 1980's named Rafael Santana, who have nothing in common but their surname.
I'm A Believer (March 4, 2003)
Mo Vaughn came to the Mets prior to the 2002 season, in somewhat less than the best shape of his life. After a poor season, he spent the winter of 2002-03 getting himself into better shape. Hopefully, a song written by Neil Diamond that became a big hit for the Monkees in 1966 will be a portent for the Mets in 2003.
Mockery (February 3, 2003)
As we head into the 2003 season, the Yankees seem to have cornered the market on starting pitchers. They also seem to broker deals to keep the Red Sox from getting anyone useful. The original tune was recorded by Inez and Charlie Foxx, but this rendition is based on the Carly Simon and James Taylor version.
Hats Off To Gary (January 18, 2003)
The Baseball Writers Association elected Eddie Murray and Gary Carter to the Baseball Hall of Fame. This song is for them.
The Ballad of Steve Phillips (January 15, 2003)
In the winter before the 2002 season, Mets GM Steve Phillips made significant trades and free agent acquisitions, obtaining the services of Roberto Alomar, Mo Vaughn and Roger Cedeno among others. The Mets finished last, and that led to the dismissal of manager Bobby Valentine. Many thought Phillips should have been fired as well. Instead, he has gone out and signed the likes of Tom Glavine, Cliff Floyd and Mike Stanton. My dear friend, and fellow Mets and Beatles fanatic, Sylvia wrote this song, perhaps as a warning to Mr. Phillips.
Nowhere Man (January 11, 2003)
Baseball commissioner Bud Selig did it again. He made a pronouncement that the All Star Game should determine home field advantage in the World Series. This goes along with previous proposals to move all the Eastern teams into one league and the rest of baseball to the other, the idea to contract two teams on the heels of one of the most exciting World Series ever played, and a negotiated labor agreement that solved absolutely nothing. Baseball fans, this Bud's certainly not for you.
Rey's Ticket to Ride (December 18, 2002)
On the evening of December 15, 2002, Rey Ordonez was traded from the Mets to the Tampa Bay Devil Rays. Despite some outstanding defense, for most Mets fans the trade didn't happen soon enough. My friend Sylvia e-mailed this song to me about twelve hours before the trade went down. When you wish for something, Syl, it happens in a hurry.
Bet The One You're With (December 15, 2002)
For the past week or so, there has been a lot of talk about a deal in the works to get Pete Rose reinstated after a 13 year banishment. To this point, Pete has not admitted that he bet on baseball. My good friend Ed gave me the idea for the song and I ran with it.
Fred Wilpon's Park (December 13, 2002)
On December 7, 2002, the Mets failed to offer arbitration to Edgardo Alfonzo, ending a long relationship. He will be missed by Mets fans.
Queensian Rhapsody (October 30, 2002)
After firing Bobby Valentine as manager on October 1, the Mets interviewed several candidates. They were unable to work a deal with Seattle GM Pat Gillick to allow them to consider Lou Piniella. After this failed, the Mets finally hired Art Howe with the permission and blessing of the Oakland Athletics. This song casts Mets GM Steve Phillips as Freddie Mercury.
Livan (October 28, 2002)
Livan Hernandez was the starting pitcher for the Giants in Game 7 of the 2002 World Series. I promised myself that no matter what the outcome, I'd write about him to an Elton John tune about an individual with a similar first name.
He's A Loser (October 19, 2002)
The Cardinal recently lost the 2002 NLCS to the Giants. In Game 4, Tony LaRussa decided to walk Barry Bonds intentionally in the 8th inning of a tie game with 2 out and the bases empty. Then Benito Santiago hit a 2-run homer. The next night, he let career .161 batter Matt Morris hit in the 9th inning of a tie game even though he had 11 more pitchers in the bullpen. He must have been resting them for April 2003.
The Long and Winding Road (August 31,2002)
On August 30, 2002, the owners and the players union reached an agreement an averted a strike, just hours before the first game would have been cancelled. During the press conference that announced the agreement, Bud Selig compared the negotiations to the Beatles' song Long and Winding Road. This, of course gave me the inspiration for my song. Thanks, Bud. I knew you were good for something.
While All The Fans Gently Weep (August 18, 2002)
At the end of July, the Mets were poised to make a run at the National League Wild Card. Through August 17, the team was 3-13 in August and the season was, for Mets fans, over. George Harrison's classic song from the Beatles' White Album sums up the feelings of most Mets fans.
Mad Baseball Hatter (July 26, 2002)
The passing of Ted Williams, and the subsequent dispute among his children of what to do with his remains, in its own bizarre way points out the lunacy going on in baseball over the labor agreement and revenue sharing. The group Jefferson Airplane had a big hit with this song in 1967. They reemerged as Jefferson Starship and had hits in 1975. They later changed their name to Starship and had hits in 1986. In all three of these years, the Red Sox lost the World Series in 7 games.
Slugger's Little Steroids (May 31, 2002)
Jose Canseco recently stated that 80% of Major League players use steroids. Ken Caminiti revealed that he used steroids when he won the NL MVP in 1996. A Rolling Stones melody from the mid 60's seems appropriate here.
Trachsel Brings Tears (May 12, 2002)
Steve Trachsel may be the slowest working pitcher in the history of baseball. A tree grows faster than he works. Smokey Robinson wrote and originally recorded the song, later covered by both Johnny Rivers and Linda Ronstadt.
Does Your Chewing Gum Lose Its Credence (On the e-Bay Auction Site) (April 12, 2002)
A piece of gum allegedly chewed by Luis Gonzalez is up for auction on e-Bay. It's authenticity is questionable, and why would anybody want something like that anyway?
Derek Bell (March 24, 2002)
Derek Bell publicly stated his frustration over the fact that he had to compete for the Pirates' starting rightfield job. Of course, the fact that his batting average since June 1, 2000 has been well under .200 might have something to do with it.
Goodbye Rube Rivera (March 13, 2002)
On March 11, 2002, the Yankees announced the unconditional release of outfielder Ruben Rivera, once a highly-touted prospect in the Yankee organization, who never lived up to his potential. Of course, stealing Derek Jeter's bat and glove didn't exactly enhance Rivera's standing with his employer or his teammates.
Some Older Guys (February 22, 2002)
As Spring Training 2002 began, several players, including Neifi Perez, Rey Ordonez, Octavio Dotel, Ramon Ortiz and Rafael Furcal, revealed that they were older than they had originally stated when they were scouted in their native lands. This truth-in-birthday business probably began in the Summer of 2001 with the revelations by Little League Pitcher Danny Almonte that he is really 14. The song was originally recorded by the Critters in the mid-1960's.
Come With Mo And Me (December 28, 2001)
The Mets just completed a trade for slugger Mo Vaughn, after acquiring Robero Alomar two weeks earlier. Juan Gonzalez has the same agent as Vaughn and is Alomar's close friend. This song imagines Alomar pleading with Gonzalez to sign with the Mets.
Alomar (December 14, 2001)
Within a week, Mets' General Manager Steve Phillips traded Robin Ventura for David Justice, got Roberto Alomar from Cleveland for Matt Lawton and prospects, signed Roger Cedeno and David Weathers, and then traded Justice to Oakland for Mark Guthrie and a prospect. All the Mets need now to put them over the top is a slugger named Juan Gonzalez.
Shop Around (December 2, 2001)
After a month of inactivity, the Mets made a move on December 1. They signed a 36-year-old pitcher from Japan with a losing record named Saturo Kamiyama. This, despite the fact that the Mets were one of the worst hitting teams in the game.
Pinhead Dimwit (November 10, 2001)
Two days after a very exciting World Series ends, baseball commissioner and all-around fool, Bud Selig, announces that two teams will fold before the start of the 2002 season. This serves no purpose except to incite labor strife. It certainly will not make the playing field any more level for the remaining teams.
Brenly (November 3, 2001)
After Byung-Hyun Kim gave up a 9th inning game tying home run in Game 4 of the 2001 World Series, manager Bob Brenly inexplicably left him in to lose the game in the 10th, and the next night, after throwing over 60 pitches in Game 4, Kim is brought back by Brenly, to give up another game tying homer. Can you say Gene Mauch and Donnie Moore? Beatles aficianodos will recognize the song.
Erubiel (October 23, 2001)
Erubiel Durazo's home run off Tom Glavine in Game 5 of the 2001 National League Championship Series provided the margin of victory and propelled the Diamondbacks into the World Series.
McCovey Cove (or The Pitcher's Lament) (October 13, 2001)
Barry Bonds hit 73 homers to shatter Mark McGwire's record. This song is about a mythical pitcher who had no success against Barry.
Armando (October 1, 2001)
In recent weeks, the Mets made an incredible, improbable run at the National League East Divison title. Those hopes were dashed in two crucial games with the Braves, six days apart, when Armando Benitez failed to hold two big leads in the ninth inning.
The Dope Don B (August 27, 2001)
In recent weeks, Don Baylor has twice removed Sammy Sosa from games in which he has hit three home runs, removing the opportunity for him to do something that's only been done 12 times in Major League history. His reasons for pulling Sosa were as lame as the act itself.
Turk Wendell, Dennis and Todd (August 1, 2001)
The Mets have been less than successful defending National League Champions. It was obvious that there was a need to get younger and less expensive, and thus they traded away some veterans who had a hand in their successes in 1999 and 2000. They are gone, but they will be remembered.
That's Amaury (June 26, 2001)
The Mets have stumbled through the first three months of the 2001 season, after winning the 2000 National League championship. Their hitting has been atrocious, and while it's no disgrace to lose to a Randy Johnson or a Kevin Brown, the Mets are getting beat by a succession of journeymen and unknowns, including the less-than-immortal Amaury Telemaco. As far as I'm concerned, all these pitchers are Amaury.
Trachsel (June 7, 2001)
Steve Trachsel signed a free agent contract with the Mets and after getting lit several times was sent to the minors. This was written just before his first start after returning from the minor leagues.
Rickey Don't Play For Numbers (May 4, 2001)
Rickey Henderson broke the all-time record for bases on balls, by walking in the 9th inning. With his team two runs down, he then attempted to steal second base and was thrown out. Another stupid move by a guy with great talent but little regard for team accomplishments.
I Think It's Malone Now (April 20, 2001)
Kevin Malone was fired by the Dodgers as General Manager. His legacy is overblown contracts, bad trades, poor public relations, and a bullpen with no lefties.
Shelly is a great Pirates fan. Please check out her page.
Down At Three Rivers (April 14, 2001)
Willie Stargell passed away the same day the Pirates opened their new ball park. This song celebrates the life of Willie Stargell and the Pirates' great 1979 season.
Uncle Albert/Admiral Hargrove (March 25, 2001)
Albert Belle's degenerative hip condition caused his retirement. An old Paul McCartney song allowed me to poke a little fun at the Orioles as well as Albert.
The Hurt's No Good (March 3, 2001)
Frank Thomas AKA The Big Hurt made a jackass out of himself by leaving training camp, whining about his contract, and then returning and saying it wasn't about money. Then his agent dropped him. Serves him right. John Cougar Mellencamp inspired this song.
It's the Same Old Song (February 26, 2001)
When Gary Sheffield was with the Padres, the top of the lineup (Fernandez, Gwynn, Sheffield, McGriff) were called the Four Tops. This song imagines one of the three real Dodger fans in Los Angeles reaction to Sheffield's whining about wanting to leave.
Sirotka (February 18, 2001)
This was written as the Blue Jays were seeking additional compensation in the David Wells-Mike Sirotka Deal. This song is how Blue Jays' GM Gord Ash would appeal to the Commissioner's office if he were Elvis Presley.
Agee (January 26, 2001)
Tommie Agee passed away on January 22, 2001. His heroics in Game 3 of the 1969 World Series will be remembered by Mets fans forever. And thanks, Jimmy, for suggesting the Rolling Stones' Angie as the basis for the song.
Old Time Pitchers Duels (January 22, 2001)
Baseball executives and umpires have been discussing a uniform strike zone. Will this result in the pitchers duels of bygone eras? Bob Seger recorded a song about music in 1977 which, with a few changes, is equally relevant about baseball in 2001.
Pallone Again (Naturally) (January 12, 2001)
This song was written as a result of a cyberspace discussion about several baseball topics, including the umpiring skills or lack thereof, and other aspects of the life of former umpire Dave Pallone. The suggestion to write the song came from one of the participants in the discussion (Thanks, Rich. I think!). Anyway, it is only fitting that the man who was one of the worst umpires in the last 50 years should be immortalized by one of the worst songs of the same era.
Labor Dispute (December 28, 2000)
Baseball on the field has been great the past few years, yet as this year ends we see major problems at the business end that threaten the game. Player salaries are still skyrocketing. The collective bargaining agreement expires October 31, 2001, and the indications are that there is little hope of a new agreement without a work stoppage of some kind. At this point, no one has proposed any sort of solution that anyone can take seriously. The Eagles provided the tune for life without baseball in 2002.
Mikey Hampton Buy (December 10, 2000)
This song was written after Mike Hampton agreed to an 8 year contract to pitch at Coors Field in Denver, a veritable pitchers' graveyard. John Denver's Rocky Mountain High was the inspiration.
Play Like A Cal Ripken (April 22, 2000)
This song was written after Cal Ripken got his 3,000th and then followed up by hitting a walk-off home run. And, yes, I know turning the title of a hit song by the Bangles into this song title is a terrible play on words.
Tokyo (April 2, 2000)
The Mets and Cubs started the season in Japan amid much fanfare. The players and fans seemed to enjoy themselves despite some problems with the field. I have taken a Beach Boys song to summarize the fan's perspective.
Strawberry Snorts Forever (February 28, 2000)
Darryl Strawberry is a good guy with a bad problem. While it is not a laughing matter, I couldn't resist taking a song by one of my favorite groups and turning it into a Darryl Strawberry song.
The John Rocker Songs (December 26, 1999)
Shortly before the last Christmas of the millennium, John Rocker shot his mouth off in a national magazine. I wrote two songs to commemorate this event. The Allman Brothers and the Temptations contributed their talents to make light of the disgrace that Rocker brought to himself, his team, and his sport.
Todd Zeile (December 13, 1999)
This song was written after the Mets signed Todd Zeile as their new first baseman, even though he only played 76 games at the position in his 11 year career. I got a little help from Little Richard.
Mr. Backup Catcher (October 10, 1999)
Todd Pratt's home run gave the Mets a victory over the Diamondbacks in the 1999 NL Division Series. This event is commemorated to the tune of Bob Dylan's Mr. Tambourine Man.
Mr. Mojo Risin' (October 5, 1999)
Each Mets' home victory in 1999 was punctuated by the Doors' LA Woman blaring from the speakers at Shea, thanks to Robin Ventura. This version was written as the Mets reached the playoffs for the first time in 11 years.
Powerre Alley (September 1, 1999)
In 1998, there was an incredible race to set the all-time single season home run record between Mark McGwire and Sammy Sosa. In 1999 they were at it again. Creeque Alley, by the Mamas and Papas, provides the music.
Tony Tony (August 7, 1999)
Tony Gwynn is the last of a dying breed. He may be the last Hall of Famer to spend his entire career with one team. This song was written on the occasion of Tony reaching the 3,000 hit plateau, to a tune made famous by Tommy James and the Shondells.
Cone on the Hill (July 29, 1999)
David Cone has been a great pitcher for more than a decade with the Mets, Blue Jays, Royals, and Yankees. This was written shortly after he pitched a perfect game.
The All-Star Game's A Playing (July 12, 1999)
A break in the regular season in mid-July gives the fans a chance to watch many of the stars of the game gather in one place for the Midsummer classic. As much as baseball changes, some of it remains the same. The contrast is explored using a song by Bob Dylan. This song was written when the All-Star game was about to be played in Fenway Park.
The Ballad of Davey Johnson (July 3, 1999)
Rupert Murdoch and Fox spent a lot of money on the Dodgers, who had the worst record in baseball in June 1999, and started July in similar fashion. As it turned out, they didn't improve much the rest of 1999, nor in 2000, and Davey Johnson was eventually fired. I've adapted a Southern California song by Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers to fit the condition of the team.
Bobby in Disguise (June 22, 1999)
Bobby Valentine was ejected from a game and later returned to the bench in a goofy disguise, for which the National League fined and suspended him. I have taken the only hit by the group John Fred and His Playboy Band and updated it for Bobby Valentine.
Light A Fire (June 1, 1999)
The Mets were swept by the Diamondbacks that weekend. The team appeared listless and bored. With the talent on the roster, this should not be happening. Bobby Valentine needed to do something to shake things up. Maybe he can with the help of Jim Morrison and the Doors. As it turned out, Steve Phillips did something a week later by firing three coaches.
Benny and the Mets (May 25, 1999)
After the Mets put Bobby Bonilla on the disabled list, they called up Hawaiian outfielder Benny Agbayani. Incredibly, Benny responded by going 18 for 35 with 3 homers. A classic Elton John song celebrated Benny's arrival.
Joe is a Red Sox fan who has put together some marvelous songs on the Red Sox and other baseball topics. Please check out BASEBALL SONGS SPORTS HEROES. Joe's song, Babe Ruth's Curse 1, is featured in the HBO film, The Curse of the Bambino.
Nomar (May 17, 1999)
On May 10, 1999, Nomar Garciaparra blasted the Mariners, hitting two grand slam homers and a two run homer. He followed that up two days later by going 4 for 5 against the Mariners with 2 doubles, and 3 RBIs. And, oh yes, the Red Sox won both games handily. Here is my tribute to Nomar's accomplishments to the tune of the Beatles' Drive My Car.
Bad Bad Bobby Bo (May 10, 1999)
The "second coming" of Bobby Bonilla to the New York Mets for the 1999 season proved to be disastrous. Early on it was obvious that his contributions would be minimal. Here is my "tribute" to the tune of Jim Croce's Bad Bad Leroy Brown.
The Ballad of Ray Miller (May 4, 1999)
Four weeks into the 1999 season, the Baltimore Orioles had won seven games. Mike Mussina won four of them. The pitching staff had a combined ERA of 6.19. And this is one of the teams with a huge payroll. How much longer can Ray Miller keep his job. This week's ballad of the low flying Birds is sung to the tune of "Witchy Woman" by the high flying Eagles (not the Philadelphia kind).
Please check out Debbie's Unofficial Fernando Tatis Web Page
Fernando (April 26, 1999)
Fernando Tatis of the Cardinals became the first player in history to hit two grand slam homers in one inning. They both came off the Dodgers' Chan Ho Park. It was amazing that Park was around for the second one, but he was. So here is the ballad of a Dominican batter and a Korean pitcher, to the tune Fernando by the Swedish group ABBA
Johnny B. Franco (April 20, 1999)
Mets' reliever John Franco became the first left handed pitcher in history to record 400 saves. At the time, the Shea Stadium PA system always played Chuck Berry's Johnny B. Goode when Franco came in to pitch. John Franco may not be the best closer in the game, and certainly there have been times when he's broken Mets' fans' hearts, and he has since been replaced by Armando Benitez as the closer. However, he has persevered. It's about time he had his own lyrics. And yes, I know that the PA system now plays the Ad-Libs' song, The Boy From New York City when he pitches.
The Ballad of John Frascatore and Gregg Olson (April 14, 1999)
The Diamondbacks' bullpen started the 1999 season by blowing game after game. This situation was rectified when they obtained Matt Mantei from the Marlins. This song is to the tune of Hurt So Bad as sung by Little Anthony & the Imperials or Linda Ronstadt.
The Chat Room Conversation (April 6, 1999)
Since you are on the web reading a baseball web page, you've probably found yourself in a sports chat room. And the conversation usually ranges from the sublime to the ridiculous. Simon & Garfunkel wrote a song over 30 years ago called Dangling Conversation. Here is my updated version.
How Can You Mend a Broken Game? (March 29, 1999)
Before each season even begins, the fans of 16 to 20 of the 30 major league teams know that their team has no chance, because their team can't compete salary-wise with other teams. It doesn't look like things are going to change any time soon. In fact, there will probably be a lockout when the current collective bargaing agreement runs out after the 2001 season. Here is my song to the tune of the Bee Gees' How Can You Mend a Broken Heart?
Goodbye Joltin' Joe (March 22, 1999)
On March 8, 1999 an American legend passed away. Joe DiMaggio was baseball in the 1930's and 1940's. Come sing along to the music of Elton John's Candle in the Wind.
The Belle of Silence (March 14, 1999)
Albert Belle signed a contract with Baltimore after the 1998 season and promised to be media friendly. That lasted until his first bad spring training game. Albert stopped talking. Fine. When he starts again, we won't listen. In the meantime, please come sing a song to Albert to the tune of Simon & Garfunkel's classic Sounds of Silence.
Pete and the Hall (March 9, 1999)
Every time the Hall of Fame gets new members, we hear the same cry about Pete Rose not being allowed in. This little song to the tune of the Beatles' Day Tripper explains why.
Baseball USA (March 2, 1999)
This song expresses the joy that baseball fans everywhere feel when spring training has arrived. Can the regular season be far behind?
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